Nutshell

I had originally started this blog about three weeks ago to cope with my husband's diagnosis with PTSD. Although I don't want to make things redundant for those who may have read previously, I thought it appropriate to give a recap of how I got to this place anyway.

About two and a half months ago, DH was due to return from a three-month training. I hadn't seen him throughout his training, and I was very excited doing the usual homecoming preparations... cleaning, stocking the fridge with favorite items...etc. These preparations were then abruptly halted by a shocking phone call from DH. He, in many more words, told me that he did not love me, nor his family, anymore and that he thought that he may be experiencing symptoms of PTSD. He also did not want to return home to me. He preferred to go stay with his parents. But, with some coaxing, I was able to get him to agree to return home and get help before making such a rash decision.

DH did come home, and immediately sought out help at the VA. Unfortunately, getting appointments ...etc. can be a very timely process. In the meantime, DH loved no one, showed no affection, had insomnia, and was irritable and on guard. I tried to be supportive, but also struggled to cope with the (hopefully temporary) loss of my husband as my best friend, lover, and life partner. DH was present, but not really.

Two months and a PTSD diagnosis later, DH felt as if he could no longer live in the house with me. He claimed that it wasn't anything that I was or wasn't doing, it was just that he was experiencing a great deal of anxiety being with me. He moved in to his parents home about two and a half weeks ago.

This was totally DEVASTATING. I thought that it meant the end of our marriage... and I must say, DH and I have been together 10yrs/married 5 yrs, and we really do have and amazing love and terrific relationship. Perhaps this is why I took it so hard. But, since that time, things have actually gotten a little better. DH and I have agreed to work toward the common goal of a healthy marriage. We have been seeing each other pretty regularly, and DH actually initiated a hug before I left the last three times I have visited. (This was a BIG deal since he hadn't hugged me since before he went away to training) His mother actually got a new kitten, which has been pretty helpful for him (I read that pets are great for people with a PTSD diagnosis). He also started seeing another counselor in addition to the one he rarely sees at the VA. This counseling was set up through The Vet Center, and it has been great. Things were set up in a matter of days. I highly recommend them if you need help fast.

Those who had read the original blog know that there were lots of ups and downs between all of this... and I really couldn't go back and write those same posts with the same feelings as I felt on those days... but, I hope that this will serve as some background info so one might know what the heck I'm talking about from here on out! : )